The Yes of Now
Distinguishing 'Should' from 'yes'- expansion from contraction
Soul-Led Living Beyond Ego and Should
In a world saturated by mental noise and societal pressure, the path to peace, clarity, and meaning lies not in doing more, but in tuning inward. This article explores the distinction between ego-led thought and soul-led guidance, inviting us into the sacred spaciousness of the present moment—what I call the "Yes of Now."
The Problem with the Mind
The mind is a brilliant tool - pattern-seeking, problem-solving mechanism designed for survival. It learns from the past, projects into the future, and seeks to protect us from potential harm. But for many of us, the mind has become the master instead of the servant. It runs on autopilot, shaped by early conditioning, trauma, and the dominant paradigms of society. It tells us what we should do, often drowning out what our soul wants to do.
As Eckhart Tolle writes in The Power of Now, "To the ego, the present moment hardly exists. Only the past and future are considered important."
J.R. Spina teaches that the ego-identity is largely an inherited construct—a bundle of programs designed to navigate the matrix of collective fear and conformity. Our thoughts often don’t even originate from our deeper self. They are echoes of conditioning, fear, and the nervous system’s desire for safety and control.
The Nervous System and Reptilian Brain
Neuroscience supports this understanding. Our primitive brain, also known as the reptilian brain, governs survival responses. It reacts to threats—both real and imagined—and is deeply entwined with the autonomic nervous system. When we feel stress, anxiety, or overwhelm, the body enters contraction. Blood flow is reduced to the prefrontal cortex, and we lose connection with creative insight and intuition.
Dr. Barbara De Angelis, in Soul Shifts, describes this as the vibration of contraction. In these moments, our thoughts align with fear. We feel tightness in our chest, disconnection, a loss of clarity. We do things because we should - avoid failure, to meet expectations, to survive.
The Yes of Now: Expansion and Alignment
In contrast, soul-led living begins with alignment in the present moment. Soul guidance feels expansive. It is marked by feelings of openness, warmth, clarity, and inspiration. The body relaxes. The breath deepens. Our nervous system returns to balance.
This is the Yes of Now.
It’s the way we feel when we are:
- Walking by a lake with wind on our face.
- Deep in creative flow.
- Laughing with a friend.
- Fully engaged in meaningful work.
- Sitting in stillness and feeling the richness of presence.
This expansion is the signature of soul. It comes not from external validation, but from deep inner resonance.
Expansion vs. Contraction: A Living Compass
Dr. De Angelis teaches that we are always operating in one of two energetic states -
Expansion or Contraction:
- Expansion is love, soul, presence, and guidance.
- Contraction is fear, survival, ego, and protection.
When we notice that we are contracted, we can gently bring expansion around that energy. Not by pushing it away, but by creating space. Just as we allow a wound to breathe so it can heal, we allow our contracted thoughts to soften in the spaciousness of the now.
This process is mirrored in meditation practices taught by Thich Nhat Hanh and Maharishi Mahesh Yogi. By returning to the breath, we create space between ourselves and our thoughts. We step back into awareness, into presence. The goal isn’t to silence the mind, but to anchor into the deeper consciousness beneath it.
Practical Application: Living from Soul
Learning to live from soul requires:
- Recognizing Contraction – Pay attention to physical cues: shallow breath, tight chest, mental racing.
- Pausing in the Now – Use the breath to return to your body. Ask: Is this a Yes or a Should?
- Following Expansion – Let soul lead. Choose what feels open, alive, resonant, even if it’s unconventional.
- Creating Space – In your day, in your schedule, in your expectations. Leave room for the whisper of soul.
As Michael Singer reminds us in The Untethered Soul, "There is nothing more important to true growth than realizing that you are not the voice of the mind—you are the one who hears it."
Real Inner Wisdom for Soul Led Living
The Yes of Now isn’t about reckless abandon. It’s about deep inner alignment. When we live from this place, life begins to flow. The struggle lessens. And in its place, we discover clarity, peace, and the unmistakable guidance of something deeper—our soul.