Be The Tap

  There’s this thing I’ve come to believe deep in my bones—if you want more of something in your life, give it. Like turning on a tap. If you want water, you don’t sit around waiting for someone to bring it—you just turn the tap on. That’s what this article is about. Not some woo-woo “karma points” idea, but something far more ancient, practical, and powerful.

It came to me while reading the Bhagavad Gita. And honestly, I didn’t even know at the time that what I was reading was called Karma Yoga. But something about the words struck a chord—this idea that instead of constantly trying to get what we think we need, we can be the source, be the channel, and that in the giving, we receive.

Level One: Tap On for Joy

It started small.

I was going through a phase in life where I was just... flat. You know that kind of dullness where even your coffee needs coffee? Everything felt gray. People around me were grumpy, small-minded, disconnected. And I was absorbing all of it. I kept thinking, “This place sucks.” I was waiting for life to do something different. Give me some joy. Some spark.

But that day, I thought: what if I turn the tap on?

So I started small. I made jokes. I looked people in the eye and smiled. I cracked silly lines at the checkout. I deliberately tried to make someone’s day lighter—even just by 1%.

And you know what happened?

It came back. But not the boomerang karma way. Not in the 'I've paid it out so I'm owed it back' kind of way. It flowed through me. The joy I was giving started to move through me. I felt lighter. I was laughing more. People responded. The culture around me started to shift. And more importantly—I felt alive again. I was the one smiling. I was the one having fun. That’s the magic of being the tap. 

You're not waiting for something to come to you. You're flowing with it and poring it out. An you know what's amazing, your not limited - the more you give the more it comes.

Level Two: Tap On for Love

Then came the second moment—something deeper. I had lost a child in my life, and even though I didn’t go down the path of motherhood, my heart still carried a longing. I missed the connection with children. I missed nurturing. That kind of love just sat in my chest, aching with nowhere to go.

And again, I remembered—be the tap.

So I applied to work with children in pediatric care—kids with cerebral palsy and serious illnesses. And every night I went in, I poured out that love. I sang to them, I held them, I smiled with them. I didn’t feel like I was giving away love. I felt like I was swimming in it.

You don’t feel poorer when you’re the tap. You feel alive. Filled. Reconnected.

Level Three: Tap On for Friendship.

The third layer came during a time I was living in a place where I just found it hard to connect to the culture I was living in. I had friends around the world I would talk to online and video calls, sure—but no one nearby I could really relate to. No one to just hang out with on a weekend. I started feeling that ache of isolation, of not having people nearby who got me.

Instead of spiraling into “I’m lonely,” I said, “Okay. What if I become the friend I’m looking for?”

So I built this. This space. This website. This offering. I decided I would be the friend I wish I had. I’d show up with presence, kindness, honesty, humor—and give that to others. And now? I talk to people every day. I get to be a friend, and I experience friendship moving through me. It’s the same every time: in giving it, I get to feel it.

This is Karma Yoga

Not in the “you’ll get what you deserve” sense. Not in the “I’m racking up karma points” sense. That’s a transactional view. This is energetic.

Karma Yoga, as described in the Bhagavad Gita, is the yoga of selfless action. It’s not about the result. It’s about becoming the channel. Doing the action with love and letting go of the outcome. Being the means, not the owner.

“You have the right to perform your prescribed duties, but you are not entitled to the fruits of your actions.”
— Bhagavad Gita, Chapter 2, Verse 47

When we live this way—tap turned on—we become the source of what we once felt we were lacking.

Psychology & Neuroscience Backs This

This isn't just philosophy. Here's what the research shows:

Generosity activates the brain’s Reward System - when we give, we experience increased activity in the ventral striatum, the same area that lights up from food or pleasure. (Moll et al., 2006)

Mirror Neurons and Emotional Contagion - show that when we share joy, laughter, kindness—others catch it. And we reflect it back ourselves.

Positive Psychology (Dr. Martin Seligman) - shows that “other-centered” acts of kindness increase long-term well-being far more than self-focused pleasure-seeking.

Flow Theory (Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi) - teaches that deep happiness is found not in getting, but in being absorbed in meaningful activity, often one that contributes beyond the self.

Service-Based Living - is also central in traditions like Buddhism (selfless compassion), Christianity (love thy neighbor), and even modern therapies like ACT (Acceptance & Commitment Therapy), which teach value-driven action over emotional avoidance.

Try It. Just Once.

This isn’t a command. It’s an invitation.

Try being the tap.

Start small: give the thing you think is missing. A smile. A compliment. A moment of listening. An act of kindness. See what happens.

Don’t do it to get something. Do it to become something. A vessel. A riverbed. A living, breathing current of whatever you wish the world would give you.

And then watch as your whole experience of reality starts to shift.

Final Words

You’re not powerless. You’re not at the mercy of what life gives or withholds. You are the tap. And when you turn it on—whether it’s joy, love, friendship, connection, kindness—it flows through you first. And that, more than anything, changes everything.

When you’re ready, turn the tap on.

You won’t run out.
You’ll run over.